There is one person that you wake up to every morning. That person is you!As soon as you become conscious in the morning, your mental chatter begins. Immediately, the quality of your relationship with yourself is going to set you off to start your day in a positive and compassionate frame of mind…or a fear-based one.

Contrary to popular belief, the opposite to love and compassion is not hate…but fear.

It is thought that building compassion, for oneself may facilitate forgiveness, gratitude, and increase resilience, offsetting the painful effects of excessive empathetic engagement, encouraging neuroplasticity and shifting the balance in a person’s life from fearful negative interpretations, to positive interpretations (Klimecki et al., 2014; Klimecki, 2015.)

Gilbert and colleagues note that compassion and similar emotions play a fundamental role in emotion regulation. Individuals who are blocked or fearful of accessing these emotions, for any reason, are likely to struggle with emotional regulation and will not do as well in therapy.

Many of us believe that critical self-talk is motivational and by using it we can ‘coach’ ourselves to achieve more. Recent research shows us quite the opposite; that a compassionate and kind relationship with ourselves will provide an atmosphere in which we can reduce fear. In the absence of fear, we can dare to become; we can begin to flourish.